Reluctant Dialogue Part 1
Sections I and II
In the next several posts, I’m going to be doing something a bit awkward. As the previous post mentioned, I have recently entered into a dialogue about what the future holds now that, in some people’s estimation, the Gaza “war” is over. I’m going to be posting my responses to sections of a message I received after I sent this reflection. I will be paraphrasing the passages from the response to provide context.
I.
The writer noted that I assumed that theirs and my perspectives would differ drastically and that while they could understand why that might be given how Jewish spaces can sometimes be, it was also an assumption that was incorrect.
I wrote: Jewish spaces have definitely disappointed (and angered) me over the years; my experience with them in the past as I look back now are shot through with racism, bigotry, jewish supremacy, entitlement, exclusivity and a kind of smugness in alienating me, whether it’s because I’m not as observant or I don’t share a hyper-zionist point of view. For a very long time I had no idea that they were characterized by these prejudices, I just thought- this is how it is, and therefore, for most of the time I was left thinking - ‘I guess I’m wrong, I guess I have to change my perspective, my practice and my understanding in order to belong.’ It wasn’t until I much, much later, long after I moved out of those spaces that I began to see them critically, and instead of indicting myself as ‘alien’ or ‘ignorant,’ I began to see other interpretations of this kind of socialization and education as deeply flawed and, in fact, harmful.
II.
The writer holds both the pain and suffering of Palestinians at the hands of the Israeli government as well as that of the trauma suffered by Jews and Israelis on Oct 7.
I wrote: I am aware that I tend to see things as all or nothing, that’s sort of a learned pathology for me — but I have had moments amid my anger at those who center the Oct 7 trauma to the exclusion of everything that came before (and after) that depart from this rigid duality. A representative example: I edited podcasts for Jewish camps this past summer. In a random interview with an Israeli counselor, there was a moment that struck me - organically. The counselor was talking about how he initially got to the camp, and that he’d volunteered with an organization in Israel that placed Israelis at summer camps in the US. He said he’d registered with his friend, who was then killed on Oct 7. He decided to follow through on the offer he got, in her honor. This was a very simple, honest moment, free of embellishment and it nailed me square in the gut.